Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Live in Arizona?

You know you're from Arizona when...
1. You are willing to park three blocks away because you found shade.
2. You can open and drive your car without touching the car door or the steering wheel.
3. You've experienced condensation on your butt from the hot water in the toilet bowl.
4. You would give anything to be able to splash cold water on your face.
5. You can attend any function wearing shorts and a tank top.
6. "Dress code" is meaningless at high schools and universities (picture lingerie ads).
7. You can drive for four hours in one direction and never leave town.
8. You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.
9.. The four seasons are: TOLERABLE, HOT, REALLY HOT, AND ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??!!
10. You know that the heat you feel when you walk outside is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door.
11. You think someone driving wearing oven mitts is brilliant.
12. Salsa is a part of your daily diet.
13. You can listen to a weather report of 117 and not flinch.
14. You notice your car overheating before you drive it.
15. You can pronounce San Xavier, Saguaro, Tempe, and Cholla
16. You no longer associate bridges or rivers with water.
17. You know a swamp cooler is not a happy hour drink.
18. You can be in the snow, then drive for an hour...and it will be over 100 degrees.
19.. You can make sun tea instantly
20. You run your a/c in the middle of winter so you can use your fireplace.
21. The best parking is determined by shade.....not distance.
22. You realize that "Valley Fever" isn't a disco dance
23. You actually burn your hand opening the car door
24. Sunscreen is sold year round, kept right at the checkout counter.
25. You put on fresh sunscreen just to go check the mail box
26. Some fools will market mini-misters for joggers and some other fools will actually buy them. Worse.....some fools actually try to jog.
27. You know hot air balloons can't rise because the air temperature is hotter than the air inside the balloon
.28. No one would dream of putting vinyl inside a car
29. You see more irrigation water on the street than there is in the Salt River, and, on that note, you have to go to a fake beach for some fake waves.
30. You can fry an egg on the hood of a car IN THE MORNING!
31. You think a red light is merely a suggestion.
32. Most of the restaurants in town have the first name "El" or "Los."
33. Your house is made of stucco and has a tile roof.
34. You think 60 tons of crushed red rock makes a beautiful yard.
35. Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer.
36. People who have black cars or black upholstery in their car are automatically assumed to be from out-of-state or nuts.
37. You know better than to get into a car with leather seats if you're wearing shorts.
38. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Arizona

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